Do you like men dressed in tunics? Do you like muscular bearded dudes fighting in underwear? So you must like greek food. This time I’m bringing you a vegan version of the world famous greek moussaka. And if you’re greek and you’re crying about how I ruined this dish because it has no lamb meat and bechamel – SUCK MY ASS!

Black Beans Moussaka

Ingredients for 3 or 4 portions:

2+1/2 cups of cooked black beans

4 big mushrooms

1 can of tomato

2 bay leaves

1 red onion

1 garlic clove

1/4 TSP of grounded cloves

1 TBSP of olive oil

15 kalamata olives

Dried or fresh thyme

Bread crumbs

2 baked sweet potatoes

2 baked aubergines

1 mozzarella cheese recipe (That Pizza)

Salt and black pepper


  • Just for you not to cry, I’ll explain again how I did the potatoes and aubergines;
  • Slice it, season with some salt, black pepper and oregano and throw the motherf*ckers in the oven 180ºC for about 30 minutes;
  • Now, start by slicing your onion and chopping your garlic;
  • Chop also your mushrooms in big chunks;
  • Add your olive oil to your hot pot and let it explode in your face and burn your eyebrows;
  • Throw in your onion, garlic and cloves, stir it and let it cooked covered for about 2 minutes. Don’t let the motherf*cker burn;
  • Add in your mushrooms and fry them always stiring until they become soft as cunts;
  • Add in your black beans, canned tomatoes and some salt and pepper;
  • Fill up about 1/2 of your tomato can with water and add it in;
  • Let it cook covered, on low heat, for about 20 minutes;
  • Allow it cool down for about an hour;
  • Remove the pits from your olives;
  • Put some bread crumbs on a glass tray, or something else you can stick in the oven;
  • Start layering your stuff, starting with a layer of potatoes, followed my aubergines and finally your black beans, olives and some thyme;
  • Check out the layering process in the video;
  • Your last layer will be the mozzarella cheese covered with some bread crumbs;
  • If by this time, you don’t have your mozzarella ready, you’re stupid as f*ck. Go see a doctor;
  • Cook your moussaka in the oven 180/200ºC for about 1 hour;
  • Allow it to cool down for AT LEAST 15 minutes before you cut it;
  • Be ready for some awesomeness;


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And keep it green. Keep it real!

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Kcal Breakdown:

Blue – 75% Carbs

Red – 11% Fat

Green – 14% Protein

It helps A LOT if you comment 🙂





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