Sunday Pancakes

“I like pancakes, I like pancakes, they make me a happy Peter. I am happy, I am happy, lalalala.”

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Standard pancakes with chocolate sauce

Do you like pancakes mate? Also do I! Here, at home, Sunday is pancake day. Except the last one. Last Sunday was returning home day and they didn’t allow me to bake pancakes at the airport. But you’re already thinking about f*ckin pancakes? All the f*ckin food you had during christmas was not enough? Jesus f*ckin christ…

Well, anyways, these pancakes are relatively healthy, I would say. There is no cholesterol or refined sugar here. The egg is still there for the hen to hatch it, the oil in the pan leave it to other day and the white sugar had vanished years ago.Also, the amount of calories you’re eating will depend on the stuff you’re gonna add on the top, the toppings you’re gonna be using. If you want to go berserk with this, it’s up to you. Normally I don’t “spare” myself either when it comes to pancakes.

And yes, I still don’t enjoy baking cakes, but pancakes are pancakes.

For 2 fellas:


Chocolate thingy:

5 Dates

2 Tablespoons of Cocoa (or carob) powder


1 Banana

5 Dates

1 Cup of Vegetable milk

1 Tablespoon of Grounded Flaxseeds

1 Tablespoon of Chia seeds

1/3 Cup of Brown rice flour

½ Cup of Buckwheat flour

¼ Cup of Tapioca flour (or maizena)

1 Tablespoon of Baking powder

1 Tablespoon of Apple cider vinegar


Before we start – are your dates soft? Like silky? Tender? Fluffy? Creamy? Like a soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur? No? So remove the pits of it and put the dates up your a… on your bowl with water! Almost got you huh?

Chia and flaxseed egg:
  • Grab a small bowl and add in the chia and flaxseeds along with 4 TBSP of water. Mix it well. Put it on the side to fluff. Did you think you were gonna eat eggs? Such a dumbass…;

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  • Peel me that banana. Yes, the one in your hand. Throw it in a big bowl;
  • If you had already removed the pits from your dates, great, if not, get to work. Add the 5 dates to the banana;
  • Mash it all with a fork until it gets, hmmm… mashed;

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  • Add the flours and milk to the banana and dates mash and mix everything;
  • Add in the baking powder and the chia and flaxseed egg and mix it one more time;
  • At last, add in the apple cider vinegar and mix it one more time. You should feel dizzy by now no?;
  • If you think your mix is too thick, use your brain. If you don’t have one, add in some water or milk;

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  • Heat a pan in your stove, on medium heat;
Chocolate thingy:
  • Once more, if you had already removed the pits from your dates, bla, bla, bla;
  • Add the other 5 dates and the cocoa powder to a small bowl;
  • Add in some water and mash the whole thing with a fork, a spoon, a hammer or kneeing it;
  • Add in some water, little by little, until it gets like a smooth chocolate cream;

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Rest of the scene:
  • As you were a good boy and you have your pan heating up, it should be warm enough already. If you didn’t follow that step, you gotta unshit yourself this time;
  • Pour some of the pancake mix in the pan, wait until it stops bubbling and turn it. Yes, without oil, like always;
  • If your pancake looks burnt, maybe the pan is too hot, just a guess, I don’t know anything about cooking;
  • I like to bake small pancakes instead of big ones okay? That’s my thing okay? Get off me!;

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  • Keep turning your pancakes like a boss until you run out of pancake mix or you had filled up a kingsize bowl;
  • Eat your pancakes with the chocolate sauce and/or with stuff you like. Like dog’s urine or something. Gross! Even if it was bee’s vomit or hen’s menstruation…;


For more stuff and shit, you can check this recipe on YouTube by clicking on the image above! And pardon my english.

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And keep it green. Keep it real!

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Kcal Breakdown:
(This refers to half the recipe, including the chocolate sauce. Like I said, you can turn this more or less caloric, depending on what you add in. I like to have it fig or orange compot, almond butter, roasted almonds, maple syrup and stuff like that.)

Azul – 78% Carbs

Vermelho – 13% Fat

Verde – 9% Protein

It helps A LOT if you comment 🙂

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